Nat King Cole - "Mona Lisa"

Don Henly - "Boys of Summer"

The Who

"Won't Get Fooled Again"


"Who Are You?"

The Cranberries - "Linger"

Donald Fagen - "New Frontier"

Men at Work - "Be Good Johnny"

Sort of the Slacker anthem of my time in school.

Coldplay - "Clocks"

Linkin Park-"Breaking the Habit"

Seal

"Prayer for the Dying"

"Crazy"

U2

"Vertigo"


"Beautiful Day"

Miles Davis

"All Blues"



"So What"(Duet with John Coltrane)

Hank Williams Sr.-"Hey Good Lookin' "

Roy Orbison

"Only the Lonely"


"Pretty Woman"


"Crying"

The Police

"Synchronicity II"


"Every Breath You Take"

Carlos Santana-"Oye Como Va"

Art Blakey and the Jazz Messengers-"Moanin"

Dave Brubeck Quartet-"Take Five"

Memorial Day 2008

Went to Cincinnati to see my niece Linzi graduate from High School. Saw my Mom, Dad, and sister and her family. Here's the highlights.

-Bought a new jazz CD-"Go", by Dexter Gordon.
-Laura got some Gold Star Coneys and I got a bag of Sliders (White Castle Hamburgers) and some Onion Chips.
-Failed utterly, hopelessly and miserably on Rock Band, and it was for "Message in a Bottle"! (May need counseling after this)
-Went shopping at the outlet mall in Fremont, and found that my big ole Patas(Spanish for Hooves) fit seamlessly in almost any type of Bass shoes! Talk about freakin' nirvana! I have always had a hard time finding dress shoes!
-During my 5 hour trip to Cincinnati, I have finally mastered sucking all of the cheese filling out of a Pizza-Flavored Combo.

Ya Basta.

Thanks.

Muto

The New Mascot for Cinco De Mayo

The Fiesta Platypus



A little goodie from the good folks at Found Magazine. I really like the mustache and the maracas.

50 cent interviews

Alex Chadwick from NPR does these interviews where he pays people fifty cents to let him interview them in public. He sets up a card table in a busy public place and talks to all kinds of people. It's really fascinating. This one is about an airbrush tattoo artist and a lady with cancer.

The Boss Backs Obama

This is not an endorsement for either candidate, I just loved this video. But if Celine Dion ever endorses any of the candidates, I would have to choose whoever she didn't choose.

Death of a Salesman

My wife and I have a list of the books that we have read. This is a list of the sort of classic literature that makes you a better person, not just any book. Harlequin Romances, Louis Lamour, those detective stories where the detective's cat always helps find clues, those are not on the list. Things like "Uncle Tom's Cabin", "Fahrenheit 451", "Leaves of Grass", "Jane Eyre", the literary equivalent of steak, potatoes and steamed broccoli is what I am describing.

My wife is 10 books ahead of me at present, but I'm not giving up.

I recently read "Death of a Salesman" by Arthur Miller. It was a very good book. It's actually a rather long three act play. It's about a salesman named Willy Loman, nearing the end of his life and trying to come to grips with how things have ended. He is not the success he would have liked to be, and neither are his sons. Throughout the play he tries to determine what were the pivotal points at which things went wrong for he and his family.

Now from the title, you know he's going to die and you know its not going to be a happy story. I actually liked knowing that from the first. Even though it was not happy, it was a good book because it forces you to ask questions about life that are worth asking.

"What is success in life?"
"What is truly valuable in life?"
"Do we all have to be a success?"

Before I quote from the book, here are a list of the characters and their backgrounds.

Willy-the salesman-spent his life selling on the Eastern Seaboard States, always middling, never truly being a great success. He is at the end of his life now-trying to figure out where it all went wrong.

Biff-His oldest son-started out as a huge success as a High School athlete, but then never could make anything of himself. Biff has went from job to job, finding some happiness in working as a ranchhand in the West, but always being haunted that he never met his father's huge plans for him.

Happy-Willy's youngest son, works in an office job, has high ambitions of being successful so he can please his father.

Linda-Willy's Wife-The one that holds the family together, always believing in Willy no matter what, she knows he is at the end of his rope and is falling deep into depression. She loves him regardless and defends him to everyone.

In the first act, Willy is trying to get off the road and work as a salesman in the New York office, he's so close to having everything paid off and finally retiring, but nothing is working out. He begins to lose touch with reality and starts going in and out of conversations with people from the past. These are Linda's comments:

“I don't say he's a great man. Willy Loman never made a lot of money. His name was never in the paper. He's not the finest character that ever lived. But he's a human being, and a terrible thing is happening to him. So attention must be paid. He's not to be allowed to fall into his grave like an old dog. Attention, attention must be finally paid to such a person.” – Linda

“A small man can be just as exhausted as a great man.” – Linda

Willy goes to his boss, and asks for help. He has worked there all of his life, but he is not profitable anymore because of his erratic behavior, and because he is not the most successful salesman. His younger boss, finally tells him he has to leave.
This is Willy's response:

Willy: You can't eat the orange and throw the peel away — a man is not a piece of fruit.

Willy: After all the highways, and the trains, and the appointments, and the years, you end up worth more dead than alive.

Throughout the play, Willy tries to convince his oldest son Biff to try again to be a great success, to use what contacts he has to start a great sales campaign to make lots of money. Biff wants so hard to please his father, he goes and waits all day to see an ex-employer to sell him on his scheme. The man ignores him, and finally tells him to leave. Biff, in a moment of anger, steals the man's expensive fountain pen off his desk and flees. Afterward, Biff has an epiphany about life, work and what's really important in life:

Biff: ...I ran down eleven flights with a pen in my hand today. And suddenly I stopped, you hear me? And in the middle of that office building, do you hear this? I stopped in the middle of that office building and I saw--the sky. I saw the things that I love in the world. The work and the food and the time to sit and smoke. And I looked at the pen and said to myself, what the hell am I grabbing this for? What am I doing in an office, making a contemptous begging fool of myself, when all I want is out there, waiting for me the minute I say I know who I am! Why can't I say that, Willy? [He tries to make Willy face him. but Willy pulls away and moves to the left]
Willy [with hatred, threateningly]: The door of your life is wide open!
Biff: Pop! I'm a dime a dozen, and so are you!

Shortly after this exchange, Willy becomes more and more out of touch with reality. He goes from hating Biff for being a failure like him, to being ecstatic at the success he knows Biff will finally be. In a moment of delusion, he decides that he will kill himself so Biff can use the life insurance money as capital to finally be the big success he never was.

The last act of the play is called the requiem. Its Willy's funeral. The life insurance paid off all the bills and his little family is at the graveside. No one came but them to the service.

Biff explains why he died.

Biff:He had the wrong dreams. All, all, wrong.
Happy [almost ready to fight Biff]:Don't say that!
Biff:He never knew who he was.

Happy refuses to accept that, and vows to fight on to be a success.

Happy: I'm gonna show you and everybody else that Willy Loman did not die in vain. He had a good dream. It's the only dream you can have - to come out number-one man. He fought it out here, and this is where I'm gonna win it for him.

When I finished reading the play, I didn't know what to think. It was a shame for a man to die an ignoble death, grasping for a success based solely on material wealth, and the fame and notoreity.

What struck me most was how it seemed to illustrate a sociological term called False Consciousness. Here's a definition:

"An awareness mystified by ideology and unaware of its own basis in relations of oppression; failure to recognise one’s own oppression as a result of internalizing dominant political discourse."

A little more simply, society programs us to believe that by working harder we will always be rewarded. When this does not happen, we always blame ourself instead of wondering if maybe its not our fault, but an unfair world system around us. If we always think that working harder and playing by the rules is the answer, we will never realize if we are being oppressed by a system that favors the upper classes (Bourgesie) and keeps the lower classes(Proletariet) under their thumb.

No surprise that Karl Marx, one of the founders of Communism was the first person to come up with this theory. Do I believe all of this? No, I don't believe all of it.

I do, however believe that there are forces at work in this world that do, whether consciously or unconsciously, seek to control our beliefs about what is valuable and what is not. There are ideas that have taken root in our world that say that success is more important than truth and love, and that making money is proof that God has blessed you.

The most important truth we need to take away from the theory of false consciousness is that we have to not take anything society tells us at face value. What we do and what we become needs to be based on a truth that is outside of the jangle of messages that society markets to us.

Willy became so obsessed with success that he forgot his family. He wanted the material wealth and the notoriety of this world more than he wanted the true affection, simple love and fufillment of the relationships of the ones he held dear. He would rather die for an illusion of success than live with the happiness of being a mediocre man who was well-loved by those around him. Throughout the book, all his wife wants is for him to love her and not leave, his boys just want him to be proud of who they are, but instead, he trades it all for the delusion of what could have been and that delusion ultimately takes his life.

Arthur Miller may have meant the play to speak to some anti-capitalistic ideas, he may have had Marxist values behind some of it-that's conjecture on my part. What I do know is that when Willy gave all he had to his job and to the god of business, it used him up and threw him away like a rind from an Orange. That should not be a surprise to anyone, business is about making money and the corporate entity surviving. If we expect more than that, we are naive.

Willy should have spent less time obsessed with success, more time working on the relationships with the people who loved him. That is where there would be true success, only what we do in the lives of people can last for eternity.

My Playlist for the Day

Sometimes at work when I am doing one of those tasks that goes on forever and is tedious, I mix a playlist on Windows Media Player and name it for whatever I am doing, or eating or feeling at the moment. One of my favorite playlists is called "Celebration for a New Chair", it was one the day I received a brand new office chair as my very own.

Today I came back to my cubicle after a very long meeting and settled in to clean up the messes of the day and mixed up this little gem of a playlist.

I titled this "Wasabi Peas and Diet Coke", in honor of my snack at the time.

"Who can it be now?" - Men at Work
"Be Good Johnny" - Men at Work
"Overkill" - Men at Work
"Every Breath You Take" - The Police
"King of Pain" - The Police
"Float On" - Modest Mouse
"Diamonds on the Soles of Her Shoes." - Paul Simon
"Would I Lie to You?" - Eurythmics
"Sultans of Swing" - Dire Staits
"Romeo and Juliet" - Dire Straits
"Las Vegas Nights" - Hootie and the Blowfish
"Working in a Coal Mine" - Devo
"The Nightfly" - Donald Fagen
"Man of Constant Sorrows" Soggy Bottom Boys from "O Brother Where Art Thou?" Soundtrack
"Country Girl" - Lord Melody from the album "Putumayo Presents: Calypso"
"Clocks" - ColdPlay
"Middle of the Road" - The Pretenders

Coffee

Some mornings I find myself not looking forward to my shower because I have to stop drinking coffee and my cup is cold when I get out of the shower. I know I could probably use some sort of commuter mug in the shower if I wanted, but there's always the danger of getting water in my cup, or worse yet soap or shampoo. I can't take the chance of soapy coffee.

Some of you may be concerned and leave a comment that this may be indicative of an addiction. I appreciate the concern, and would like to point out with that kind of quick-witted amateur psychological diagnosis I am sure Dr. Phil is shaking in his cowboy boots. The bigger indicator to me is that I get a headache in the morning if I don't drink it.

I don't mind that, because coffee makes me happy. There are times when I have a feeling of well-being and peace that comes from coffee,at times, it almost feels like a religious experience.

Henry's Blend from Seattle's Best is my favorite. I do not like Starbucks. Except for their Breakfast Blend, they do not know how to make any kind of mild blend. There are times that all of their coffee tastes like a burnt expresso blend. On the other hand, I do like to hang out in their stores, sit on the leather couches and eat bagels and hang out with friends.

Burritos and Politics

On Friday, a group of about six of us went to my favorite Mexican Restaraunt, Los Gallanes. Now I have my own ideas about what makes a great Mexican restaraunt. Of course, the food should be excellent. There should be a lot of it, and it not be too expensive--'cause I'm cheap.

More than that, the vibe should feel uniquely Mexican. Which perfectly describes Los Gallanes. Its in a supermarket that was renovated from a True Value Hardware Store and painted in bright yellow and green. There is blaring music, and the sort of garish posters everywhere advertising upcoming concerts with guys in big cowboy hats and women with too much cleavage showing.

Then there's the service and the food. I come in one day and order a chicken burrito, and am told "no chicken today". The next time I order Eggs and Chorizo, and they have no eggs. Sometimes we get free appetizers, other times an incredible free black bean and mushroom soup. Sometimes its closed and once we came in and were told they had to wait for a health department inspection (They had just remodeled-its a very clean place).

Some people don't like this kind of uncertainty. But I love it. Its the sort of adventure that living in Latino culture can be like. Nothing runs with the same Gringo efficiency, but the latin charm and good humor makes it worth the trouble. There's enough places where you can go and get the same food for the same price in the same amount of time-go to McDonalds or Wendy's if you want this kind of banal dining experience.

Anyway, my credibility with my friends from work was about shot. They told me this was my last chance and were starting a pool with reasons why the restaraunt would not be open. So I called and spoke to the waitress (and check-out girl) and she assured me the cook would be in before lunch and it was ok to come. We came, we ate and had a great time. The service was slow, but the salsa was outstanding and we were given two great big plates of really good guacamole. The next day at work, my friend Chad and I had the following conversation:

"I had a dream Friday where a burrito came to my house and talked to me. I think that means there is something wrong with the burritos. "
"Really? What did it talk to you about? Was it Chicken or Beef? Did it have the yellow sauce?"
"It had the sauce. We discussed how cold it was, and how John Edwards makes empty promises. Wish I could make stuff up that cool."
"So did it have arms and legs and eyes?"
"It didn't have arms, but it had legs and was wearing tennis shoes."
"Did it have an accent?"
"No, it just sat down on my bed and talked like a normal person. I told my Mom about it, she got mad and told me not to say anything bad about John Edwards."
"Maybe if he would have reached out to the Latino community like Hilary has, he could have got more support from giant talking burritos."
"Yep..."

While he seemed almost blasé about the whole thing, I could tell it was eating at him. I told him he needed to let it all out or the burrito would win. He'd see the burrito everywhere. Finally, he aquiesed and did some informal art therapy and drew the burrito. Here is the burrito in his room. Note the Jarritos Pineapple soda on the nightstand.




It seemed to help a little. So he pushed through the pain and drew the burrito again. This time as a defiant and powerful figure for change, leading this new political revolution against insincere politics. At first, it almost reminded me of Diego Rivera's iconic murals of Zapata, but then I cleaned my glasses and realized it was just a burrito.



Three days later, I tried to talk Chad into going for burritos again today, but he had this haunted look in his eyes and he began to shake visibly. I decided to let it drop-it was still all too fresh...

Juanito

Dr. Buzzard's Original Savannah Band-Cherchez La Femme

You ever find yourself liking something, but you aren't sure why? At first you are confused, then amused, annoyed, then quietly overjoyed over something that is dissonant yet makes you happy anyway. That's how I feel about this video.



So, what is with that outfit she is wearing? Is it a dress, a jacket, a robe, what? The rest of the band is is really cool, and being in the musical instrument business, I love seeing the vibes, timpanis, and brass and woodwind. What's up with that guitarist? He is funky in an almost creepy way, like David Byrne from the Talking Heads.

Anyway, tell me what you think.

Juanito

Bunnee

One of my favorite websites to visit is Found Magazine. They collect all manner of notes, letters, drawings, and any other media that was found. This one really caught my eye.

I find myself afraid to go rabbit hunting alone now...

Juanito

My Nerd Score

It's Coming Closer...

There it is.

Over the horizon, just out of view, but edging closer every day. I can feel it just out of sight, waiting for me. I walk down the streets and I can feel its prescence out there in the shadows. If I spin around when I'm walking I might see a flash as it disappears down an alley. Sometimes I think I hear footsteps, and I stop and then I don't. I know I tend toward a little paranoia, but this is real.

We have to meet someday, but I thought it would be so much later. I've seen other people go through this, but I never thought it would happen to me. I've tried to ignore it, avoid it, but it's no use. There is nowhere I can run, nowhere I can hide. It will finally hunt me down and stare me straight in the face. I'll look away and it will finally grab my face and force me to stare at its horrible visage.

My fortieth birthday will be here on the 31st...

I'm still trying to figure out what to do about it.

If you want to help, click on the Amazon Wishlist over on the sidebar, because no matter how old I get, I still become an 8 year old gift mercenary between Christmas and January 31st. I'm ok with that. I'll say that my mother spoiled me, because I was the baby, but I'm getting a little too old to blame things on my Mom any more.

Juanito...