Why Santa is Wrong.

It's funny that as you get older, you find yourself thinking about things you really never gave a second thought to when you were younger.

Take Santa for instance.

No, it's too late for me, I know that he does not come down the chimney, and he is not getting any more of my cookies and milk. If he did exist, I'd probably be on the naughty list after this! My problem with Santa is not due to the generous mythology that has developed around him. My problem with Santa is that he is a bad symbol to celebrate the birth of Christ.

Let me show what I mean, here's the lyrics to the popular Christmas song, Santa Claus Is Coming To Town*:

"You better watch out
You better not cry
Better not pout
I'm telling you why
Santa Claus is coming to town

He's making a list,
And checking it twice;
Gonna find out Who's naughty and nice.
Santa Claus is coming to town

He sees you when you're sleeping
He knows when you're awake
He knows if you've been bad or good
So be good for goodness sake!"
(J. Fred Coots, Henry Gillespie (c) 1934)

If we believed this song, Santa Claus is a combination of the Pope and Homeland Security. He judges our sins and weaknesses with omniscience and infallibility. His agents are lurking behind every tree and corner. There are elves stationed on every rooftop and hill, aiming parabolic listening devices and night vision goggles at our houses and apartments, spying on each child day and night. Out in the community, in coffee shops, bars, beauty shops and other "adult places", out of sight of kid's eyes, are posters telling adults how to report bad behavior to Santa. It's no wonder kids get extra squirrelly this time of year, Christmas must feel like some childhood version of George Orwell's 1984.



This invention of Santa Claus as a symbol of judgment and unflinching righteousness does not seem to be based on any common stories of Saint Nicholas as a person, yet in many of the celebrations around the world, he continues to reward the good children and punish the bad children.Click here to read about the historical Saint Nicholas). I guess that society unconsciously looks for ways to control behavior any way it can.

"For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast."~Ephesians 2:10

That's what I don't like about Santa. The stories we tell kids about Santa reinforce the wrong ideas about Christmas. He only brings toys to the good boys and girls, and coal to the naughty ones. But when God brought us the gift of Jesus Christ, he brought that gift freely to a world of bad children, stained by all manner of sin and naughtiness.

We did not deserve this gift. Christmas is not about being good enough to deserve God's free gift. Its about God giving us what we don't deserve, and us having the faith to accept it freely.

Merry Christmas.

-John

Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer

I'm sitting on the couch enjoying one of my favorite holiday specials, that Rankin-Bass classic, "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer". I'm wondering what I would look like in a bowler hat, I mean I've already got the plaid Christmas vest. Maybe I could dye my goatee white every year. I love Christmas so much, it could be a two month holiday as far as I am concerned.

Back to the movie, ever since this has come out in the 70's or 60's,(I'm not sure when, I can't decipher that "MCMLXV" stuff on the credits), most people near a TV have watched the show over and over. I love everything in it, from the little poodle pulling Yukon Cornelius' sled, to the "Charlie in the Box" on the Island of Misfit Toys. I also find myself repeating Rudolph's catch phrase, "I'm coot! I'm coot!", you know, 'cause I am.

The music is so memorable. I find myself singing "Why am I such misfit? I am not just a nitwit!", or "Have a holly, jolly Christmas! Its the best time of the year!". The funny thing is, this year I realized this show was actually really subversive for its time. I'm not kidding. This year I realized that Rudolph could have been written by some Liberal-Arts Sociology Professor. Let me explain...


Rudolph and Hermes don't fit in. They are misfits. I love the part in the first part of the show when the elf-boss mocks Hermes for wanting to be a dentist. "Who ever heard of an elf that didn't like to make toys?". It's like he is saying "There is only one kind of elf-you are wrong for wanting to be different", it's classic social-conflict theory. Both Hermes and Rudolph are alienated from the group because they don't submit to its wishes, or they don't appear like everyone else. They in turn, leave the group and make their way on their own and in the end overcome the group stigma and become valuable on their own terms. This is classic sociology theory, when people are unable to submit to the mores of societies, they have to find alternate methods to gain status and resources.

The island of misfit toys is kind of the climax to this thought. Santa finally determines that misfits can be main-streamed throughout society and will be great toys because of their "different-ness".

To take this even farther, Santa doesn't want to be fat, but he is pushed into overeating by other people's images of what he is supposed to be. "Eat, Papa eat! Whoever heard of a skinny Santa?", his wife tells him. He's got food issues I tell you! He could be like a bulimic trying to get in a size 0, except exactly the opposite.

You can even see feminist thought in how Rudolph's girlfriend and his mom strike out on their own to join the search party, even though it was dangerous for women.

With all this in mind, I have formed the skeleton of a thesis and I will start continuing research on a paper I have decided to call "Themes of Alienation as Seen in Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer". I have checked out the academic search engines, I will be the first to present this ground-breaking research.

Or maybe that's just the egg-nog and cookies talking, I get kind of goofy when I get all sugared-up. After all, it's just a bunch of puppets...

Merry Christmas.

Johnito.