If the people at the Dyson company and Kenny G could join forces it would result in the most powerful force of suction the universe has ever known.

Frank's Bad Day Part I

Frank had never really contemplated the size of a city
bus.

Sure, he saw them as he walked the streets of Chicago,
but he normally drove everywhere, insulated in the
white noise of his XM radio and air conditioning in his
sensible mid-size sedan from the sweaty masses that
frequented public transportation.

However, today when Frank absentmindedly stepped off
the curb onto the busy street, he thought about busses
in a very concrete way as he was hit by bus 304 on the
Crosstown Express.

In the milleseconds that followed the impact, Frank
sailed through the air, entering the intersection of
Lakeshore and Michigan. During this time, Frank
pondered the mass, size and speed of the bus. If the
bus had been an animal it would have been as fearsome
as a T-Rex, but instead it was as domesticated as some
giant aluminum dachsand on wheels.

Before Frank could further ponder the anthropomorphic
aspects of the bus that hit him, his skull and spine
came into contact with the side of a Little Debbie
Cakes delivery truck and he crumbled to the asaphalt
like a rag doll. Frank had a secret love for Little
Debbie Oatmeal Creme Pies. He would get one after
spinning class at the Y every Wednesday, so the irony
of this was not lost on him. Before his eyes rolled
back into his head and he blacked out, Frank looked
up at the side of the truck and thought,
"Well, I always knew they were bad for me."

Frank's Bad Day: An Introduction

Frank`s Bad Day started as a silly dark story about a guy who gets hit by a bus. Somehow I wasn`t content to let him lie in the street, and decided to send him on a trip through the afterlife. I felt it was necessary to express that this story bares no relation to my own theologic views. As an Evangelical Protestant, I do not believe in Purgatory, I think that faith in the sacrifice of Christ on the cross was enough to get us to heaven. That said, I was drawn to writing about a different version of Purgatory after I read the C.S. Lewis book, The Great Divorce, about people who could take a bus ride from Hell to Heaven and stay in Heaven if they wanted to. Lewis used the story to make some very good points about sin and human nature and essentially that people choose their eternal destinations, it's not thrust upon them. There was also a portion in The Christmas Carol that gave me an idea for this story. So I'm stealing from C.S. Lewis and Charles Dickens, which I'm sure you will agree are very good people to steal from. I really like writing fiction with dialogue because its like writing an essay but letting the thoughts develop through the story instead of just trying to convince someone by rhetoric. One of the interesting things about this story is that I write it on mainly on my new phone (it's got a qwerty keyboard-like a Blackberry) and then I email it to Blogger when I have a chapter done. I had heard about a lady in Japan who wrote a book this way and thought it was a good idea. Hope you like it, if not, I will certainly understand, but I may be tempted to think less of your literary taste... (not really). John

Click here to read part I

The cats seem to hasten to escape my my Celtic tribal drum music. Bagpipes and Digerridoo with four different types of tribal drums must not meet their cultural sensibilities I guess.

Big giant salad has agreed to be my friend.

I am considering copyrighting The phrase "I will be on that like hunky on Hasselhoff" .

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