Saturday, May 09, 2009

A Cavalcade of Fortune Cookie Commentaries.

I've been a little slack in my fortune cookie commentaries as of late. Here's a bunch at once. Thanks to Princess Moe for the handful of fortunes and insomnia for the motivation.




I sometimes find myself wondering, is there a nice Asian person in the back of bakery writing these? Do they go home at night and after dinner say to their kids, "Today children, I dispensed the deep wisdom of our ancient culture to many of the American people, hoping that they will turn towards the lessons we have to offer."

Then the family will all smile, and and nod in solemn agreement, until the patriarch's moment of glory is ruined when his grandmother starts laughing and pointing at him. Finally she gains composure, and says, "You know those little slips of paper just get left on the plates, stained with General Tso's sauce! If you want to really share wisdom, get on the internet or Reality TV, that's where its at!"



I find myself wavering back and forth on fortune cookies. Is there deep wisdom I just don't get, or is there someone who is not a native English speaker trying to write beatnik poetry? Either that, or this writer used to work in the old VCR factory writing owner's manuals.



The coffee will be fine thank you very much. Keep your joyful energy to yourself until about 11 am, then we can talk...



Ok, this could be the impetus I have been waiting for to go out and do something incredibly stupid-look out world, here I come!



Come on! You aren't even trying! Maybe you can get on Maury with psychic ability like that!

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