Third Person Madness

The humble blogger who maintains this site was recently asked by his professor to write an autobiography in Spanish. John was pleased with this because he felt he could handle this, and also the fact that first person verbs are the first ones that all Spanish students learn(Yo estoy, Yo Soy, Yo digo, etc..).

Then, the assignment changed. The professor decided that the assignment would still be a biography of the student, but instead of first person, it would be in the third person. John confided to this writer that he felt a little strange about this. Certainly its not as schitsophrenic as describing yourself in the first person plural, "We are writing a biography about ourselves." or "We felt very strange about this turn of events."

But nevertheless, John struggled with the ideas of trying to define himself as if looking from the outside in. He described it as like losing some inward compass, and finally having to look at yourself as others see you. I started to think that the blogger felt a little lost and insecure at looking at his life through the eyes of others. He could always explain the delays in his dreams, his procrastinations, and the large and small failures in his life through the lens of his good intentions his very typical, yet few personal faults. But without that internal narration that the first person view provides all of us, all of these shortcomings would certainly not be as justifiable through the third person voice. "Don't you see? Speaking of yourself in the first person just seems to justify any mediocrity so much easier", he explained, lifting one eyebrow in that mischevious way we all find so charming about him. This writer believes that John actually fears someone in the world might yet determine he was less than perfect.

But over a cup of John's favorite coffee Henry's Blend(Seattle's Best), (1 Nutrasweet, 1 Sugar-in-the-Raw, Skim milk) in the homey IUSB Cafe, he mused that maybe his reluctance to write about himself in the third person was because it also exposed his own real desire for self-promotion, self-agrandizement. Its a very common, underlying motivation for all bloggers. But not just them, everyone wants to be publicized and celebrated for the individuals that they are. Maybe not with overwhelming fame that takes all privacy, but the idea that everyone knows what is unique about us.

When John considers the two problems of writing a biography in third person, he finally agreed within himself that if he could not change these feelings, he would acknowledge they were real. He told this writer that if he could not overcome this, he would at least not deny that within himself he wanted to promote all the good things about himself to the world, and deny the existence of his failings, delays, and faults.

This seemed to satisfy John, he knew that total transparency to the world was probabally not possible. He also reminded himself it was just one assignment and that he has a tendency to take himself entirely too seriously sometimes...